A friend I never met, Renee Knoch

A friend I never met, Renee Knoch

Three years ago a friend of mine, Weiwei, who lived in Washington DC area, asked for my help. That was the time I got involved with a project to translate a book from Chinese to English. (please see my previous post)

She said me, "it has been a year and half since I started, and it turned out to be harder and slower than I anticipated." I thought my English was not good enough, and I told her so. Then she said, "It is all right because I have an English friend who has been checking the English on the first pass that I translated. I trusted her English and I am confident that the language should not be a problem." Subsequently I stepped into the trap. The English woman was Renee Knoch. She lived in the DC area.

Shortly after, I started corresponding with her.

She was a strong fighter, a cancer survivor. In 2007 she retired from her job due to her illness. At that time the cancer had spread to other parts of her body. I learned the situation from Weiwei. Renee never complained about her illness nor dawdled about her bad luck. On the contrary she lived each day fully. In addition to her daily responsibility, including taking care of the housework, her husband's needs and communicating with their children, she was very enthusiastic about the project we were working on.

She was happy to help. Every time when I finished the translation for a chapter, I would communicate with her. I knew that there were many mistakes that I was not able to see, yet very trivial and basic, but she never complained nor had been critical of me. Sometimes the sentence did not make sense, she would ask questions to let me view from a different perspective. We were able to get it right after a couple of rounds.

Renee was optimistic. Who wouldn’t want to be? But when I imagined being in her position, I felt it would be very hard. During many months that I communicated with her, she never mentioned about her illness, in stead she was always full of life and ready to go on and on.

She was willing to learn. In many cases due to the complicated setting and background of the story, Renee had a difficulty to grasp the story line. We had to communicate back and fourth several times before she finally got it. It not only required patience but also the deep dedication to the project. She never got frustrated from the various obstacles that we were facing. On the contrary she said because she did not have much knowledge of China and then was eager to learn. Every time when she learned something she could not hold back her joy and satisfaction of this new knowledge. Sometimes she would request additional information to help her understanding the background of the story. After she received and read the information, she emailed me with gratitude, "I learned a lot from it and understand the Chinese people better."

Renee was an open and warm person. Reading the book that had a part about the WWII, reminded her of her own life. She went through the air raid in London as a little girl at that time. She wrote about it and emailed it to me. I really appreciated her sharing. Gradually our relation deepened. After I wrote an assay on a public blog to commemorate my mother’s ten years passing, I felt the urge to share with her, so I sent her the link. She not only read it, but also sent me her comments. It really moved me deeply. Even though we were far apart, and never saw each other, yet we could understand each other well through written words.

She also shared her personal experience in life with me. In July 2011 she wrote me an email to express how happy she was to be a grandmother for the second time when her second granddaughter was born.

Our book project had lasted longer than the contract. In due time we contacted the author and extended the contract. At that time we still had several chapters to go before we could go over the whole book for a second round of checking. Then we received Renee's email.

At the end of September 2011 she emailed Weiwei and me to inform us she was going to have an open-heart surgery and would be back in two weeks or so.

My intuitive reaction was not encouraging, since I knew open-heart surgery is a rough procedure even for a relatively healthy person. For Renee, a weak elderly cancer survivor, it was going to be very difficult. But she was upbeat and did not show any hesitation or worry, just as if she were going for a routine procedure. From her email she did not show any doubt that she would be able to come back healthier and stronger.

Two weeks passed, no any news came from her.

A month, two months passed. I worried about Renee. Weiwei contacted Renee's family and informed me the not good news. Renee had been in intensive care for a couple of weeks and then was transferred into a hospices facility. Her condition had not been stable.

Our project had to go on without Renee. Then it was not only for the original purpose, which was aimed to improve understanding of Chinese for Americans, but also for our friend, Renee.

After another year’s hard work, we published the book in September 2012. Within a few days, we heard the bad news from Renee’s daughter that after a long tough fight Renee passed away.

Although the book does not live up to the standard Renee wanted because there are many mistakes due to my poor English. But I wish that reading the story would improve the understanding between Chinese and Americans, and that it can inspire people to appreciate the good life that we, Chinese and Americans, have. I think it was also Renee's wish.

Renee was a warm hearted, passionate person. I am fortunate to have known her. She was a friend of mine even though we never had a chance to meet.